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20 May 2010 Negative Emotional Attachments Suffocate Your Dreams
Author:  |  Topic: Associations, Influence  | Tags: , , , , , , ,  | One Comment

It is possible that when you read this headline the image that immediately came into your mind was that of relationships.

This is definitely one area where so many people in this world are trapped into negative emotional attachments. I use the word “trapped” rather lightly because in actual fact you are only “trapped” if you want to be.

So many folk who are involved in negative relationships use their situation as an excuse for not “being able” to achieve their dreams. This is the blame game!

You are where you are today because of
the choices you made yesterday.
YOU are responsible for your life, your dreams, your destiny.

Once you and I really come to understand and accept this truth of responsibility we now have to choose:

  1. Stay in the “trapped” relationship or situation.
  2. Take steps to cut all unhealthy ties (how you would do this will depend on the relationship – family or friends).

Friends:

  • Take a look at the last 5 phone calls that are listed on your cell phone that you either made or received.
  • Was the conversation with each of these folk constructive or destructive?
  • Did you finish the conversation feeling challenged, motivated and encouraged? Or did you complete the conversation feeling angry, frustrated and depressed?
  • If you answer yes to the second option (angry, frustrated or depressed), hit the delete button on their name in your contact list!

Family:
Do you have or more family members who leave you angry, frustrated or depressed after a conversation with them? How can you deal with this? Here are some tips:

  • Take time to sit down with this family member face to face and explain that you have made a decision to develop yourself to become the champion you were born to be.
  • Gently yet firmly let them know that you have come to understand and accept that YOU are responsible for your dreams and goals in life. You have decided to take action and pursue your life dreams.
  • Gently tell them that you love them but you cannot allow them to shower a host of negative words on you.
  • Firmly yet gently warn them that if they attempt to corner you with the intention of powering out a host of negative words, you will hang up or walk away.

One of the things that I hear quite often is:
I tried this, but my (mother, brother, uncle etc) does not understand. They may not “understand” at first simply because they don’t believe you. However they WILL believe you once you take action.

It is 1000% necessary that you take action
and follow through with your plan!

JillTake action today and remove yourself from the influence of negative emotional attachments and you will discover you are freer to pursue your life’s dreams.

This is the third article in a series: “Are You Free To Follow Your Dreams”.


What action can you take on this article that will make a difference in your life? Please share your thoughts here
17 Apr 2010 Denial Won’t Fix It
Author:  |  Topic: Decisions, Habits  | Tags: , , , , , , , , ,  | One Comment

Heated discussionToday as I was riding the bus it was impossible not to hear a very loud cell phone conversation. “Shut up” was the angry reply to whatever was being discussed.

Then it hit me. Why try and continue the conversation? Why not just hang up. To continue talking was actually to deny that no real conversation was possible – at least for this moment.

Suddenly I realized that we all have a measure of denial in some area of our lives. After all, it is so much easier to ignore something than to confront it right?

Ignoring a situation or worse still denying its existence will not stop it from
hindering your development as a champion.

The only way a situation or a habit will stop hindering your life is when you face it and deal with it.

For example:

  • You may have one (or more) friend who is sucking the life from you. Every time this person calls the conversation is full of negative words and complaints. Yet you don’t want to hurt them, so you put up with it.

    After hanging up you spend the next hour or so trying to get your mind back on the positive track so you can regain that expectancy and enthusiasm you had at the beginning of the day.

  • You may have a habit in your life that you really don’t want to change, but you know you need to. But you try to deny that this habit is damaging to your health, well being and success.

The question for today is: Do you REALLY want to achieve success in your life?

The difference between dreaming of success (however that is defined for your life) and of REALLY wanting to achieve it is
determined, relentless and ruthless action.

Determined action:
You can only act with determination once you have made a definite decision.

Have you made a definite decision to pursue your why (your life passion and dreams) whatever it may cost you?

Relentless action:
To be relentless, you need to keep your vision in front of you every day. You can do that by creating a vision board.

Our brains think in pictures first and then translates those images into words. A vision board allows your mind to keep your vision clear and concise.

Relentless means you will always be pushing onwards and upwards towards your dreams. You will never give up.

A vision board will keep your vision in front of you so you will always be motivated to continue no matter how difficult or hard life may get.

Ruthless action:

  • You have made a decision to pursue your dream.
  • You have decided that nothing will stop you.

Whatever (or whoever) is stealing or hindering your dream has to be deleted from your life. This does not mean we need to become selfish in our pursuit of our goals and life passion.

But it does mean that you cannot allow anyone to infect you with their negative words and attitudes. These attitudes are destroying them, and they will destroy you too if you allow it.

You will be your own toughest coach which means you will not allow yourself to stay in denial on any issue. You will demand of yourself that you face your habit or situation, deal with it and change it (or delete it from your life).

Denial will not fix anything in yours and my life. It takes determined, relentless and ruthless action to:

JillFace it – deal with it and change or delete it. Then victory will be yours!

Photo Credit: Nothing Personal, Just Business on Flickr


What action can you take on this article that will make a difference in your life? Please share your thoughts here